WELCOME TO WOMEN’S LIFE COACH MONTHLY NEWSLETTER.

Issue 3 – 21 May 2002

A BIG welcome to all new subscribers. It is great to hear from you. I hope that the WLC newsletter gives you delicious food for thought and some useful life strategies too.

Thanks in advance to regular subscribers for forwarding this issue to friends, family, colleagues and associates. The more the merrier!

This month’s theme is FUN! (in capital letters). I hope you enjoy it. Remember to let me know how you found the TRY ME suggestions. Please also send any of your favourite websites, quotes or books to me here and they will be posted in the next newsletter.

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Let the fun begin!

Jenny van Dyk

Women’s Life Coach

This month’s issue includes:

1. Off the Cuff – Let your fun side hang out!!

2. Try this… Its time to play.

3. Women’s Life Coach – Freebies for all.

4. Mag of the Month

5. Quotes of the month

1. OFF THE CUFF: LET YOUR FUN SIDE HANG OUT!

What moments in your life stand out as the most FUN? When last were you so giddy with pleasure that time stood still and you forgot about yourself? When have you been so absorbed in an activity that you’re completely ‘in the moment’?

In a brilliant article entitled ‘The Clue is in your Funprint’ (O magazine May 2002), life coach Martha Beck argues that FUN is as integral to our grownup lives as it is to our childhoods.

‘Each of us has our own unique propensity to have fun doing certain activities in certain proportions,’ she says. She calls this fun propensity our ‘Funprint’. (Like thumbprint…getit?).

‘Your fun-print isn’t a frivolous indulgence,’ she insists. ‘It is the map of your true life, an instruction manual for your essential purpose, written in the language of joy.’

Reading this sentence was like having hundreds of fairy-lights flicked on, dominos-style. In a flashback to childhood I remembered that an essential type of fun for me involved initiating and belonging to a group. So much so, that when I moved to a new town, aged 6, one of the first things I did was create my own club, complete with a coded language and secret passwords.

As a child I would spend hours designing intricate Christmas cards or making calligraphy place names for dinner parties. I loved what my Gran referred to disparagingly as ‘fiddle-faddle.’

Reading was also an endlessly gleeful activity for me. My favourites were Annuals like Jackie and June which would transport me into an imaginary world of boarding school, beauty tips and boys.

The startling thing about this quick fun inventory is how little my sense of fun has changed in twenty years. I still love initiating and bringing people together. One of my all time favourites was planning a Freudian fancy dress party after graduating. I lost myself in the imagination and detail of it - right down to the last ‘pickled prick on a stick!’

My love of Annuals has grown up into a love of women’s magazines, which I now write for. A favourite grown up moment was making a Valentine’s card for my husband with so much glitter, sequins, cutting out and fiddle-faddle that my Gran would have turned in her grave.

Examining my ‘funprint’ has highlighted the areas where my life has become fun-less and stale. At work I often don’t allow myself to do the things that I really enjoy- like making playful worksheets for the children I work with. I can see now that the loneliness that I occasionally experience is because I miss belonging to a creative group. (I’ve since decided to start a writing group).

It’s reminded me that I have the capacity to have fun alone as well as with others and also helped me understand why things that I think should be fun– like shopping for clothes and make-up- aren’t fun for me. They’re just not part of my funprint.

I’ve discovered that paying attention to your ‘funprint’ can shine light on why you’re miserable in a particular job or suggest how you can make it more rewarding. It may offer a glimpse of a career you should be pursuing or provide clue’s about your life’s purpose or calling. Or, like me, you may pinpoint some important ingredients that are missing from your life or rediscover a forgotten passion.

Learning to recognise and respond to your unique sense of fun is far from frivolous. It is one of the most crucial things you will ever do. Or as Martha Beck puts it: Fun is a serious business.

2. TRY THIS….ITS TIME TO PLAY

FUN COLLAGE

Browse through old magazines and tear out images and words that represent your unique sense of FUN. Stick these on cardboard in a playful/random manner. Stand back and take a look. What is your first reaction…happy? nostalgic? rearing to go?

What do these images tell you about yourself? Are there any parts of yourself or your sense of fun that you have forgotten or buried? If the person represented by these images were your best friend what activities, hobbies, lessons or job would you suggest she pursues?

BONUS TIME!!! Do this with a friend. Swap your collages when they’re complete and interpret each other’s fun-type. Recommend hobbies, activities (as above).

FUN INVENTORY

In your trusty notebook write down or draw your top 15 fun moments. Include the little things (eg. chatting to a best friend, dressing up, tickling a cat) as well as the bigger, more obvious ones.

Are there any patterns? Are most of your moments alone or with others, indoors or outdoors, do they involve physical activity, words or some form of creative outlet? What are the common denominators across these activities?

Which are missing from your life and what impact it is having on you?For instance in my case: belonging to a group is missing and the impact is loneliness.

BONUS TIME: Jot down what you can do about it and DO IT. Eg. Start a writing group.

FUN RESEARCH

Keep a week-long fun journal. Each day write down your major activities. Score each activity out of ten, where 1 means fun-less and 10 means fun-tabulous. As the days go by look out for which activities and people give you the most fun.

Be prepared for some surprises – you may discover that something you think of as fun, consistently gets a low score, whereas activities or people you may overlook, get higher scores than you would have anticipated.

This is a powerful reminder that it is not necessarily money, education or extravagance that yields the most fun. Often what gives us a true sense of fun are smaller, less obvious and forgotten activities.

(Adapted from O magazine, May 2002)

3. WOMEN’S LIFE COACH:FREEBIES FOR ALL!

If you are interested in a FREE taster coaching session or simply wish to find out more about life coaching please e-mail me at : jenny@womenslifecoach.com or call +44 (0) 1225 314 694.

4. MAG OF THE MONTH

This month it’s got to be O magazine. Apart from being a visual feast (every page is likely to make you drooly, broody or just darn-right covetous) the content is also superb. All the articles are well-written, thought-provoking and life-enhancing. Personal favourites are (predictably) the Martha Beck Life Coaching features and Reading Room where well known authors review their favourite books.

5. QUOTES

‘You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.’ Plato

‘I am not eccentric! It’s just that I am more alive than most people. I am an electric eel, set in a pond of goldfish.’ Dame Edith Sitwell

‘To make living itself an art - that is the goal.’ Henry Miller

***If you see yourself in one or more of these categories, why not consider a FREE taster coaching session. This is a no-obligation opportunity to ask all about Women's Life Coach and get a feel for how it works.

E-mail me here, or telephone +44 (0) 1225 314 694

Coaching sessions are completely confidential and take place via telephone.

Each session lasts an hour and is tailor-made to meet your specific needs and to fit in with busy schedules.

Individual sessions cost £35. A monthly coaching package consisting of 4 sessions costs £120 (£5 discount per session)

Remember, you can contact me here or by telephone on + 44 (0) 1225 314 694.

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